Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

How do I write a character’s physical description without it feeling unnatural and clunky? I’m able to describe their hair and body relatively easily because my writing puts emphasis on small movements and fidgeting, but I can’t describe faces.

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

So I’m getting piano lessons and my teacher wants me to get an upright piano instead of a keyboard. An upright piano is way above my price range, so what do I do? And what’s the difference between an upright piano and a keyboard?

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I can count

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

Fighters react to Kamaru Usman's rebound win vs. Joaquin Buckley at UFC on ESPN 69 - MMA Junkie

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

How will Israelis respond to someone claiming that anti-Zionism is not anti-Semitism, in the same way as anti-feminism not being misogyny and opposing same-sex marriage not being homophobia?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

What’s a historical event you wish more people talked about?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Are you afraid of being alone?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I have complete contempt for fakery

Why do black people prefer thick, curvy women?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Kristopher Mohamed needs help to fund cancer fight - Trinidad and Tobago Newsday

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

Do you consider yourself pretty?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

What the early "F1" movie reviews are saying ahead of New York premiere - Motorsport.com

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What can I do when I'm ugly on both outside and inside? What do I do? Cut myself off from the world to make everyones lives better? I'm a monster. I hurt feelings, and I say what was said to me. I feel like I'm nothing but a burden. What do I do?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I understand how hurricane paths work

I actually pay taxes

How do I cope with the fact that I will never have a girlfriend?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have a reading level above third grade

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Who is the dumbest law enforcement officer you have ever encountered?

I can read

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What do flat earthers think about Antarctica?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t buy bullshit

Why am I so tired of the keto diet?

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I see through liars

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I have complete contempt for traitorism

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee